What better occasion than a charmingly rainy Spring Sunday afternoon to take care of a long due tidying-up of my blogroll (that list of blogs found under the Links tab above)…

In fact, it was mostly an occasion to crash on the couch, procrastinate all day and do some reading while nibbling on the relics of yesterday’s food orgy, but having accomplished one tangible task, no matter how trivial, gives me a faint sense of accomplishment and somewhat helps relieve the guilt.

First off, I finally ditched the “linkroll”, as you are all probably subscribed to the same dozen blogs I and everybody on the net goes to, to get their fix in “quirky” humorous pieces of web lore. Real links of interest will make it into posts of their own from now on. But anyway, I do suspect your first motive for visiting this blog is not to find the latest in kung-fu-fighting cat movies or dorky teenagers lip-syncing to cheesy eurodance.

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Wherein the author enumerates much meaningless data and uses them as springboard for some slightly more topical meandering…

  • 1,059 WordPress plugins currently sit on wp-plugins.net. Not bad for a project that was half-shunned by the official WP pubah(s) from the very beginning. Kinda getting worried by the amount of bandwidth this is eating off my quota right now (read: somewhere in the 200% vicinity). But we’ll cross that bridge when it starts falling.
  • 11,232 SK2 downloads for the year 2006 so far. There again, not bad for a plugin that doesn’t happen to be the one packaged by default in WordPress 2.0.
  • 968 comments (mostly Trackbacks and Pingbacks, as I closed comments on this page a while back) on SK2’s homepage. Can’t help but notice an uncannily high percentage of posts from Germany. Is SK2 like, the David Hasselhoff of anti-spam plugins?

As you can tell, despite being on cruise-control mode, the Deliverables Department of UnknownGenius Corp. is doing nicely. As for where it’s heading, I suppose I may use the occasion to offer a quick update:

The short answer is that it is going nowhere.

The longer answer is that, ultimately, I will be phasing out all WordPress development (and most web coding, actually) from my activities.

For those who care about the Why, I will try to provide some elements without delving too deep into the multiple layers of frustration and unrelated motives for my general disinterest toward WordPress at the moment:

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I just got a brand new handheld Japanese dictionary. It’s very complete, using one of the best database out there, smaller than a few credit cards stacked together and I paid 20,000 yens for it.

Oh, it also plays mp3s.

And movies.

In fact, it does a whole lot of things, pretty much anything I want it to do, provided I have time to write a program for it.

It’s an iPod Nano, running µClinux, thanks to the brilliant work of the iPod Linux team.

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Will any of you sharp visitors throw in a supposition as to which part of my stupid laptop is not working as it should, today?

As you no doubt caught on by now: a glyph crucial at communicating in writing most linguistic constructs of latin origin, is outright missing from this post’s body. That tiny plastic thing on my laptop that usually allows for input of this particular symbol, is constantly snapping out of its spot, foiling all plans to lay my thoughts in a straightforward phrasing without using such unnatural turns of words. My vocabulary has abruptly shrunk to dramatically small proportions. And with it, so has my sanity.

Having no motivation nor skills to commit a full book in this fashion, I shall stop torturing my brain for words, right this instant, and ask you to kindly wait until I fix this quandary for a dispatch of any actual worth.

And thanks go to this guy for unwittingly prompting today’s trifling contribution to this blog.

If you hold back anything, I’ll kill you.
If you bend the truth, or I think you are, I’ll kill you.
If you forget anything, I’ll kill you.

In fact, you’ll have to work very hard to stay alive, Nick.

Do you understand everything I’ve said?

Because if you don’t, I’ll kill you.

Rory the Breaker

I’m deeply sorry that my first post of note in weeks must be about such a pedestrian topic, but I feel it is time to publicly edict certain rules about commenting on this fine piece of thought-challenging writing we call our blog.

Ironically, while strait-laced spam (you know the kind: congratulation on the neatness of your post punctuated by a recommendation for this interesting site about horses playing texas holdem’ with mature grandmas) is no longer an issue, “semi-spam”, or plain non-spam-but-moronic comments have become a real problem. I blame Google, and the thousands clueless imbeciles it washes up on my shores daily.

For the first time in History, it is possible to get a glimpse into the collective IQ of a sizable share of this planet’s population. And trust me: it is rather depressing. Not that I had much doubt left, but this shall go a long way in reenforcing my personal opinion that, as a species, we are frighteningly dumb. How we managed to make it thus far is beyond me… and a strong argument in favour of Intelligent Design theories… I mean, there has to be a God out there. A God that, for some unfathomable reason, is personally attached to the survival of a species who considers “I like cats!!!!11111” and “u R s0 kewl!!!” to be the best possible use of nigh-boundless, worldwide inter-communication.

Don’t get me started on Google queries.

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First blog update on Spam Karma, WordPress development and Spam in many months, and a crucial one at that. Being notoriously verbose to the point of irrelevance, yet with lots to say today, I have tried to provide a telegraphic sum-up below, feel free to skip and go straight to the parts you may care about (hint for the busy ones: the plot thickens mostly around part 6 and 7).

1. How well is SK2 stopping spam currently?

Pretty damn well, thank you.

2. What’s wrong in the peaceful Kingdom of SpamKarmia then?

A new breed of Evil has been summoned and is threatening to breach in.

3. How evil?

Very Evil… and powerful.

4. Won’t anybody show up and save the day?

Doubtful…

5. Is there really nothing you can do?

Of course there is.

6. Then why aren’t you busy doing it, you lazy bastard

Here is why: …

7. You wouldn’t leave us to die here, would you?

Watch me.


And now for the details:

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I already expressed in the past my thoughts on hot-linkers

I don’t think I need to go over the vast insignificance of script-kiddies: they rank somewhere between leeches and mono-cellular organisms in the general scheme of Internet things. Actually more like irritating little flies or mosquitoes…. Mosquitoes with really, really small penises and a need to overcompensate for it.

But to be both a script-kiddy defacer and a hotlinker…

That just begs for me to take 10 minutes off my very busy moving day and go the extra-mile in moronic-hot-linking prevention:

[Before] [After]

Picture lubitel_lomo.jpg As announced previously, I shall soon take on my next intercontinental move. And with it, comes the quintessential thrice-a-decade shot at Zen-Buddhist enlightenment, by shedding my lowly physical existence of all the useless materialistic junk I have accumulated over the past few years.

Put simply: I wanna travel light, when I leave in December. We all know that is not going to happen, but if at all possible, I would love to avoid reiterating last September’s episode of little old me, in the middle of Narita airport, handing over copies of Nietzsche’s Morgenröte and Russell’s History of Western Philosophy to hapless passersby, in a desperate effort to bring my luggage somewhere closer to the maximum weight allotted (including the extra 50% charitably granted by a sympathetic airline employee).

This Autumn cleaning, though, is more about uncluttering my life, getting rid of things I would never consider giving up, just making sure I keep my addiction to shiny baubles and uselessly expensive clothes under control. This is my own personal version of zen detachment: splurge on mindless consumeristic shopaholism for a few years, then strip it all down to three suitcases, the moment I skip the country.

And don’t think for a second that I am the unmaterialistic, happy-to-live-off-water-and-air, sort of guy: not only am I ridiculously attached to my things, but I also have this near-clinical tendency to pack every single bit of paper, receipt, bill etc. in the vague hope they’ll be of some use one day.

In this spirit, I have decided to offload my camera. Not any camera, mind you, but my faithful old Lomo Lubitel 166U.

Saying the любитель 166U was made by the Leningradskoye Optiko Mechanichesckoye Obyedinenie (Leningrad Optical Mechanical Union) in the early 80’s should give you an approximate idea of what we are dealing with. It was bought for less than $20 equivalent in roubles in a rather decrepit Moscow store, about 10 years ago. Although brand new then (came in a sealed box), it had already been sitting there for a good decade. Much like these rumoured Kalashnikovs made entirely of ceramic so as not to trigger metal detectors, this camera is pure plastic (with some glass for the lenses).

The Lubitel has made its reputation ever since as a cheap amateur camera that lets you easily take somewhat blurry artsy overexposed shots of people, without needing much of a formal training. Truth is: if you are half a photographer (Goddess knows I’m not, but having been assistant to one, I know the basics), you can take very decent pictures. Given proper conditions you might even come out with great pictures (the kind you usually only get with a $4K Swiss-sounding camera brand). It uses 2″1/4 rolls and a pretty wide aperture at its maximum setting, which means even your most underexposed mundane pictures will come out looking like the work of some seventies New York photographer if you squint a little.

As for me, I used it as my party camera: while the number of settings (all manual, of course) would usually be enough to confuse the most sober photographer, it turns out that overlooking most of them and just plain point-and-shooting with the focus on infinity gives, in 9 times out of 10, a very satisfying result. The tricky part was always to remember to advance the film manually. In fact, more than tricky, it’s damn near impossible, when down to your last 10% of neuron supply and pupils the size of a 500 yen coin, to spot the small, barely visible, indicator on the back of the camera that lets you see the numbers printed on the back of the film… My solution was to go by an approximate count and hope successive exposures wouldn’t overlap, that is: when I even thought of advancing the roll altogether. The results were often, to say the least, experimental (lots of double-exposures, some of them really neat).

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Picture ipodnano_black.jpg Longtime readers of this site may remember that I have in the past voiced certain strong feelings toward that famous fruit-theme brand. Worry not, my mind hasn’t changed, and the fact that my G4’s supposedly brand new screen, already replaced a first time, is starting to show up the familiar white blotches all over again (and this time no warranty), just hasn’t been helping at all.

I had last vowed, stomping on the remains of my prematurely dead iPod’s battery, that I would never purchase Apple hardware ever again in my life.

Sure, Apple can be a sweet and caring lover at times… After all, they still make one of the best operating system out there, despite recent efforts to put an end to this trend (that Tiger? it’s so bloated and overfed: you could probably poke it with a meat stick and walk away safe). But the moment you fall for its sleek looks and shiny baubles and bail out one of them good-looking Powerbooks or bad-boy iPods, then their real side will show through: daily abuse will set in, money will go missing and you will soon start finding suspicious paraphernalia around the house.

Seriously, though: that whole “Superior Quality” myth around Apple products is way long gone. It disappeared around the time they started shipping computers that most proletarians could afford: over ten years ago. The original Mac 512K or that souped up Mac Classic on which I did my first Mac Paint drawings? It still worked 10 years later; hell, for all I know, they still work now. On the other hand: LC3? Performa? Powerbook G4? Give them a year or two and you’ll end up with some of the most technologically-advanced paperweights ever made.

What? You think Steve Jobs goes to Taiwan every morning to personally handpick the components that go into your computer? Your beloved Mac hardware is made from the exact same stuff as that Windows-based piece of junk your neighbour is running. Your extra money doesn’t go into quality components, it essentially goes into financing R&D for new shades of white plastics and buying fresh gazelle snacks for their OS menagerie. Unfortunately for them, Apple’s tight-knit user community is also what allows them to compare and realize that entire series of the stuff they bought are blatantly riddled with factory defects. As a result, no sane well-informed customer would ever consider using the first generation of an Apple-made product, unless receiving a monthly paycheck from their QA department.

So why, oh why, did I buy this damn thing? I know it will break well before reasonable wear sets in – actually, it already has for many. I know it’s still the same maker of shiny but shoddy hardware. I know I’ll be back here to rant about its defects soon enough.

I could try and justify it by saying that the nano is fairly cheap (compared to the rest), so incredibly damn small and I just couldn’t take another week without portable music device (see device stomping incident above).

But at the end of the day, we all know there was no rational justification. The pattern of abusive relationships is just a hard one to break from.

But look at him! He’s so cute and so tiny… How could I resist! I know he didn’t mean what he did to me last time: He changed. Things will be different this time…