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(as the movie we’ve been watching together is rolling its credits…)

Her: [Looks up suggestively and moves hand across bed]

Me: You do realize this is quite possibly the worst pre-coital movie. ever?

Her: [Keeps silent and smiles a wicked toothy smile]

Me: That’s it! stay the hell away from me!!! I’m sleeping on the floor tonight.

(awesome movie, otherwise)

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Upon latest head count, it would appear that direct family members are:

  • Brother #1: Expecting the great Kanto earthquake from his Tokyo apartment (any day now).
  • Brother #2: Traipsing the Moroccan Desert with his backpack and a donkey.
  • Brother #3: Learning Cantonese pillow talk in Shanghai.
  • Dad: Watching snow melt in Eastern Canuckistan.
  • Mum: Enjoying Lebanon northwestern coast (lovely weather at this time of year), currently deciding between Syria and Cyprus for an emergency evac (wins extra bonus points for Country-on-the-Brink-of-Civil-War).

Honestly, I don’t know what that says about us as a family.