Being a bedridden moribund with not much better to do than following the outcome of the next Mister Homecoming America pageant, I guess I ought to be somewhat enthralled by the close race unfolding before our eyes.

Truth is: I don’t really care anymore.

First, Kerry is gonna win the election. by a landslide. [yea, you got that right…]

Many reasons to that. including, but not limited to, the fact that polls did not pay the slightest attention to the radically different political context of this year: much stronger mobilization, mass registration drives among minorities, youngins actually getting off their ass to go cast a vote, since p-diddy and eminem told them to do so… all them people who are usually not George’s best friends. And despite all this, the restrictive sample polled still can’t get itself to give a clear support to the incumbent.
Let’s just say it’s not looking too good for Mr. Yeehaw tonight. Which should have the added effect of pushing most of the undecided morons, off their fence, into Kerry’s garden (“undecided” being just the standard technical term for “whatever the majority decides… baaah…”).

I did not say that Kerry would be the next president, mind you: for that to happen, we would still have to see that poor excuse for an electoral system somewhat working in the direction of the democratic process. A concept that got lost rather early in the application of that massively irrelevant piece of law they call the US Constitution.

It is not totally out of the question either, that a bunch of young republicans lead by Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld clad in black denim uniform and cow-boy hats would go and discreetly slit the throat of a few hundreds political opponent while Dubya declares martial law on the ground that Kerry couldn’t have won without the help of the Terrahrists.

Although my guess is that they’ll keep that for 2008.

But the real reason I am unable to channel any more angry concern into that race. The reason I don’t really care even if the Shrub gets handed a four-year supply of lube and resume taking turn reaming America’s ass with his neo-con cronies. The reason I actually won’t even be that desperate if that happens?

Well: like most of the world eons ago, I am pretty much ready to give up on America for good…

You know, if after all that’s been done, all that we’ve seen, there are still a near half of the country ready to put this dangerous dimwit at the head of the country, there is very little hope. No matter who gets elected in the end.

My advice to the ones still living there: secede California and the East Coast, give the fly-over states to Bush and take the keys from the nuclear silos on your way out. Within a few years of inbreeding and corporate-sponsored looting of natural resources, the place should be fit for use as a giant Theme Park or something.

Interviewer: People say that… that… Bush is the kind of guy they would like to have a beer with. You don’t feel that way?

Jon Stewart: You know… I don’t like to drink with people who are alcoholics…

Jon Stewart, interviewed on C-SPAN