Dave

The “I” List

  1. I currently live in Tokyo, Japan.
  2. I love chocolate.
  3. I have lived on four continents, a dozen countries and more houses than I care to remember.
  4. I have been sharing my living space with roommates or significant others ever since I was fifteen.
  5. I was practically a vegetarian for many years. Mostly out of dietary habit.
  6. Gave that up completely upon moving from the very veggie-friendly city of San Francisco, to the very veggie-unfriendly country of Japan.
  7. I am currently happily omnivorous.
  8. I don’t like seafood, though.
  9. Out of politeness, I will (and did) eat practically anything.
  10. Practically anything has included, among many things: baby wasp larvae, locust and natto.
  11. I am a cat person.
  12. I do not anthropomorphise my cats by trying to give human-centric explanations to behaviours that can perfectly well be explained by simple animal instincts to stay warm and well-fed.
  13. I have no issues, however, doing exactly that for my computer.
  14. I once worked as a bartender in a Tokyo strip-club.
  15. I have graced the cube farms of a few prominent Bay Area tech companies.
  16. I’ll let you guess at which job I witnessed the highest amount of whoring-out and outright seediness.
  17. Of my years as code-monkey and pseudo-cool-boy-software-whizzkid, I have only retained a profound contempt for corporations and their management personnel.
  18. I have five given names on my passport(s).
  19. Yes, I have grown tired of having to explain to incredulous immigration officers that my parents just couldn’t decide.
  20. My real first name is actually David-Alexander (hyphenated).
  21. Nobody has called me that ever since fourth-grade.
  22. Even my parents renounced pretty early on.
  23. My least favorite ice-breaker: “So, where are you from?”
  24. My favorite ice-breaker: “So, you like kicking puppies in your spare time too?”
  25. I have been known to make up very stupid answers to generic getting-to-know-you questions at parties.
  26. Even more so when drunk/high.
  27. Even more so when talking to drunk/high people.
  28. “Florence Nightingale” and “Adult Movie Director” have been two of my most common straight-faced answers.
  29. This habit has so far resulted in a few people addressing me as “Florence” every time they saw me and two people inquiring in all seriousness about job prospects,
  30. I can order a gin-tonic with lime and compliment the bartender on its taste in five languages.
  31. That would be seven, if I knew how to say gin in Latin and Ancient Greek.
  32. I am strongly political, yet have long come to understand that arguing about politics is about as pointless as arguing about religions (probably because politics is religion for lots of people).
  33. If anything, my position on most matters could be described as a very personal mix of economic liberalism, radical socialism and some tiny amount of libertarianism when it comes to civil liberties: let’s just say I am lucky I am not living in 1950’s America.
  34. In my personal 9th circle of hell you probably would find, along with the usual suspects, the likes of Ronald Reagan, Dick Cheney and Margaret Thatcher (if you just pointed out that not all these people are dead, you need to take a closer look next time their body shows up on TV).
  35. I do not consider myself affiliated to any given political party. If I was, it doubtlessly would be considered left of center in your country.
  36. Ways to make me seriously dislike you include displays of racism, homophobia, fratboy machismo and overall any sort of attempt at compensating for a small dick.
  37. Other than that, I’m a pretty friendly guy and very outgoing with strangers…
  38. Although I went to catholic boarding school, I am neither strongly anti-religious, nor into organised religions at all.
  39. But I certainly know that bible book better than you do, so you probably ought not to use it on me.
  40. I you really had to stick a label on my beliefs, I guess you could call me agnostic with some interest in non-mystical buddhism.
  41. I got married at Graceland chapel, Las Vegas, with six of my best friends present.
  42. The hour was 6:30am. The day was Sunday, on my 21st birthday.
  43. Yes, a whole week-end of miscellaneous substance abuse was involved. No, it wasn’t the reason we did get married in the first place.
  44. We only got an official divorce two years later, mostly for administrative reasons.
  45. I went to Burning Man before you knew it existed.
  46. I attended Burning Man three times, never two years in a row.
  47. I do not, in fact, take any pride in the above two items. Really, I don’t.
  48. I did, however, feel a few tingles of sadness the day Burning Man t-shirts went on sale on the official website.
  49. From past experience, I do believe it is the fate of every community to eventually join the mainstream or die.
  50. I do not think this is a good thing, nor a bad thing.
  51. In many occasions, I have found myself in places and times that have been thereafter labeled of “historical significance”.
  52. I am neither to blame nor to praise for being there: 90% serendipity, 10% curiosity are the only reasons I ever was where I was at the moment.
  53. I am acutely aware of the deeply laughable aspect of the term “historical significance”, in the grand scheme of things, when attached to events and trends of the past two decades.
  54. I have a deep-rooted phobia of needles.
  55. My fear of needles is much stronger than any fear I may have of chicken pox, polio, diphtheria or any disease for which I have successfully avoided all mandatory “booster” shots for an ongoing 15 years now.
  56. I am not very interested in attempts at fitting sexual orientations into neat categories.
  57. Although I am convinced sexual orientations are much more fluid than what most people would want to believe.
  58. I probably rate a 1 on the Kinsey scale (ok: 1.5 if David Bowie counts).
  59. I believe that true feelings of love between two consenting adults, regardless of their sexual orientation, should prompt respect and appreciation, If anything.
  60. I have many vices but no addiction.
  61. I rarely drink coffee, hardly ever smoke cigarettes.
  62. I have been known to drink Bloody Marys on random mornings, for no other reason than because I felt like it.
  63. I have been known to go weeks or months without a drop of alcohol, for no other reason than because I didn’t feel like it.
  64. I have tried at one point or another in my life, most common psychoactive substances, as well as some not so common ones.
  65. I am highly circumspect of most pharmaceutical drugs and do not ever take any unless absolutely mandatory.
  66. Feigned, fictitious or possibly real mental alienations of mine: bipolar disorders, attention deficit disorder, mild paranoia and seasonal affective disorders. All of them proudly unmedicated.
  67. I am of average height in Europe, short in the US and slightly above the current Japanese average (which probably won’t last more than a generation if they keep drinking milk like they do).
  68. The two principal phenotypes I have inherited from my mother are a particularly white skin and a propension not to put up a single pound, regardless of what I eat.
  69. Yes, I am, indeed, a skinny white boy.
  70. Ironically, I was born on a remote tropical island near Africa, mostly by accident.
  71. Major natural phenomena I have so far witnessed: major earthquakes (> 6 on the Richter Scale), typhoons, tropical cyclones, floods, volcanic eruption.
  72. I tend to like nice clothes and usually pay close attention to my own appearance and clothing, but loath people who judge character on such criteria.
  73. I would spend months’ worth of rent at once on nice pairs of Italian shoes at a point in my life.
  74. I do not do that any more. But still have all the shoes.
  75. I like nice suits and own a few very fine custom-made ones.
  76. I make a point of ignoring all dress-codes and only wear a suit when not required to.
  77. I think prominent luxury brands on items of clothing or other objects are extremely tacky.
  78. I am not overly fond of denims. I hate khakis. Polo shirts give me hives.
  79. I have practised Judo, Jujitsu and a few other martial arts for many years.
  80. I am very much non-violent.
  81. I do exercise, for about half an hour, every single morning.
  82. I am a full-fledged music nerd. To the point of making any music-related excursion in my company highly irritating for more casual appreciators.
  83. I easily own over 2000 “vinyl” records, a few hundreds (legal) CDs and just too many gigabytes of digital music files to count them.
  84. I can recognise any of the track I own, from the first two or three beats alone.
  85. I do say “record” to designate about any physical music medium. I pronounce it “rekhid”.
  86. Any piece of music, regardless of genre, length and medium, is a “track”.
  87. I listen to any musical genre and like all sorts of music, save for the extremely untalented and blatantly commercial.
  88. “Any musical genre” includes obscure classical chamber music, Italian opera, old-school hip-hop, insanely trippy acid house and Leonard Cohen.
  89. Extremely untalented usually includes stuff so bad that it needs to be looped to exhaustion through every available mainstream media outlet until it hypnotises anybody into paying for it.
  90. As a matter of fact, blatantly commercial stuff also fits that definition.
  91. Although I am a mediocre instrument player, I have absolute hearing and can usually pinpoint a note half-a-tone off in a track without paying attention.
  92. Things I really need to be somewhat sober to do well: find directions, beatmatch, write code.
  93. Things I can do all the same, if not better, when seriously altered: type on a keyboard, dance, play the piano, discuss metaphysics, speak foreign languages, bartend.
  94. I have two tattoos, no piercing (cf needlephobia, above).
  95. Beside my taste for reading, I have an irrational love of books and physically can’t stand people who write notes on them or tear off corners.
  96. I sometimes fake forgetfulness to hide my freakishly good memory of conversations and situations.
  97. Things I can never remember: any abstract numbers… phone numbers, zip codes, birth dates, street addresses. Including my own and those I’ve been using near-daily for many years.
  98. Things I remember effortlessly: entire book chapters, movie dialogs, the names of most of my first-grade schoolmates.
  99. I suck at lists.

73 comments

  1. Yea? What’s your excuse? 😛

    Bah, otherwise it was in fact quite easy: instead of blogging for two weeks, I enjoyed as much quality time with my bed as I could, videotaped my navel, and threw down a couple lines in that list whenever I thought of something: trust me it makes for easy (if thoroughly unfascinating) writing…

  2. you are a fascinating creature.
    what a fabulous list.
    we share much in common.

    how do you go about explaining the intense phobia of needles (one i also share – and i have many a humorous fainting-fit story to prove the fact) and the ability to get plural tatoos? i have my own little explanation to offer to the puzzled folk, but i’d like to hear from another in the same position as i.

    arumanda

  3. arumanda,

    bah, mostly I did drugs and got drunk a lot, really nothing too fascinating about that 😛 I’m sure pretty much anybody can conjure at least equally impressive credentials in life.

    As for the irrepressible fear of needles (my stories usually consisted more of having to get 5 nurses to tie me to a table as a kid in order to approach me with a needle, rather than fainting): this is indeed an interesting question, but it’s always seemed kind of obvious to me… my phobia has nothing to do with pain, everything to do with a psychological block…

    In a way, tattooing guns (I never went the hardcore old-school needle way) aren’t very close to needles in my mind, neither are most sharp objects, or even things such as a pin or a sewing needle. I could play with these and even stick these in my skin without caring that much (episode of some rather gross self-surgery involving sewing needle, gin and a lighter comes to mind), while on the other hand, the mere sight of a surgical needle piercing skin (mine or others) makes me wince.

    I am not particularly proud to say that, to this day, I pretty much have to close my eyes whenever a movie shows a close-up of somebody shooting drugs or any other use of syringe/needles (way too much, these days)… yea, a big boy like me…

    So now, what’s your explanation? 🙂

  4. ah hah. i see. thank you

    i am the constant source of wonder and amusement for my friends and family, with my regular fainting spells. my most recent dilemma is that i need to get my first ever filling, but there’s absolutely no way in hell anybody’s gonna stick a needle near me, let alone inside my mouth. what the hell kind of sick beast would do that to a fellow human being? i’d prefer my teeth to turn black and rot away.
    well, i’d probably rethink that option if they actually did turn black and faded from my mouth, but i think you can sense my sincere disdain for the evilness of needles.

    my explanation – i believe it has something to do with invasion. needles go into the skin, pierce inside. it’s a sharp, pointy object inside my body and it just don’t belong there. it doesn’t hurt, in fact i don’t mind a bit of pain. i quite enjoyed getting my tattoos done as a matter of fact. as you say, the little buzzing machine is nothing like a needle, and it’s purely on the surface, it’s actually not invading my body and coming deep inside.

    it doesn’t sound like much of an explanation when i write it down like that, but it’s enough of a deep seated fear in me, to cause me to black out, cease breathing, fit and wake up with masked faces towering over me and a various range of contraptions stuck onto me. i’m not sure where this all originated, but it doesn’t make life very easy. i really should look into doing something about it, but i’m also the queen of procrastination. so i doubt this will get fixed very soon. in the meantime, i too will have to keep looking away from bloodied scenes on tv and anything looking vaguely like the shape of a needle…

    too embarassing and pathetic for words.

  5. arumanda: yea, I think it has something to do with invasion and objects piercing my body… well, anyway, like any phobia, it is hardly rational at all.
    As for dentistry, I empathize, injections in your mouth are actually both disagreeable and painful. Then again, going without isn’t a good idea at all. Really not sure what sort of stuff J-dentists operate with, but maybe nitrous oxyde would be a good idea (followed by an injection, when you are too busy giggling to notice the needle piercing your gums)…

    Good luck! 🙂

  6. Thank you for the “sou desu ne” page, even though i was quite frightened to find an actual page about “sou desu ne”, i am very grateful, thanks!
    (I left a comment there too; there seems to be alot to read here, well, instead of wasting my time on Wikipedia, i guess i’ll waste my time reading this…)

  7. Sir,

    I have no words to thank you for producing such a wonderfull plugin for wordpress. I was attacked severally by bots and have heap of comments under moderation. See below few things:

    – 4 hours wasted on daily basis to recieve and delete 1000’s of mails
    – 9000 + post moderation per week
    – have to disable comments for all
    – Pain and worry every day

    Now within 5 minutes I am ready to fight with any one. My mind become free and I really thank you for this wonderful piece of software from my soul.

  8. Nice site. Great blog, inspires me to get my own keitai working on a blog as soon as I can.

    I stumbled across your pages after asking a friend about the contents of Regain J . Bought some, but am half-afraid to drink it. Who needs that much taurine anyway!?

    Anyway, just wanted to say I enjoyed the substance abuse bit. Sounds like you got a lot out of Japan – have fun wherever you go. Only been here 4 months myself, still hating bikes and fearing winter…

    – Nick, Hyogo

  9. 凄い, such a huge list, didnt bother to finish it, because there is just soo much in your mind to write about, and when people asks you will just say look in to the list. fine blog i say, and very interesting too. onlything is that you are too boring ^.= (espically the layout) XD, well next time change to only 1 item in the list, and make it huge, XD contrast

  10. # I am a cat person.
    # I do not anthropomorphize my cats

    Are you sure this is a good idea? Your cats are definately assessing your catness and you are definately going to come up short if you don’t asses their humanness in return. Don’t be fooled by the small braincase – the catmind is very compact.

  11. Needles. Yes, same here and also my brother. Both of us gained our fear in childhood at the hands of a drunken dentist. However, both of us overcame our needlephobia later in life at the hands of different high-craft dentists. Eventually, intolerance of pain overcomes fear of penetration.

    If you could invent iontophoretic dental anaesthesia, many needlephobes in the world would rejoice.

  12. A photo of you might be nice.

    If you’re confident enough to give us all these cool facts about yourself, you’re not shy, so take the plunge. Post a handsome photo of yourself. No a goofy one — that’s a cop-out. Photos in dark glasses or under hoods are tedious to the rest of us. I want to see YOU. So a nice regular photo will do. I want to see who has been catching all the spam bandits on my site, Dr.D

  13. JoJo,

    But I am very shy… plus the embarrassment of being recognized on every street corners by crowds of adoring fans… that would just be too much to handle…
    As for random pics, being the photographer of most of what goes online here, it’s a bit difficult technically to be also the photographee, but indeed I am there, among the hundreds of pics of random places and people… I’m sure there are a few shots of me… Let’s see if you can spot them 😉

  14. See, my mom was right “natto” is a most unnecessary food and she’s from Tokyo. Loved the list and read it all. Being in San Francisco I can see how easy it is to be vegetarian, leave the city and one has be omnivorous. So skinny white boy geek used to be in SF in the tech field, that’s the perfect description of my husband. He doesn’t like sea food either. I’m very amused. Thanks for being in the world.

  15. Let me Testify, and join the ranks of those weeping openly, tears of Joy for their SK-2 plugins. The N’er-do-wells can’t compete with your Kung-Fu, Dr. Dave.

    Letting machines deal with machines is so much better.
    Robots’ Rules of Order!

    Darn fine site here, too, Florence!

  16. You sound like an interesting fella… just one question about #35:

    “I do not consider myself affiliated to any given political party. If I was, it doubtlessly would be considered left of center in your country”

    What if my country is North Korea or Laos? Would you still be left of center? Just wondering.

  17. Monsieur,

    Je vous le dis de manière tout à fait amicale. Il est obscène de se mettre ainsi en scène.
    Quel manque d’humilité.
    Quel manque de considération pour les personnes qui souffrent sur cette terre, pour les vrais problèmes.
    Quelle branchouille bobo répugnante.
    Ca sent le 92 à plein nez.

    Je vous conseille la lecture de ‘L’imitation de Jésus Christ”

    Cordialement

    Yvan le Ber

  18. Dear Mr. Yvan le Ber

    Sir, I tell it to you in the friendliest way too: you really need to get yourself a modicum of understanding for the whole concept of “irony”.

    The fact that you obviously know neither me, my blog or what you are talking about should in itself call for a prompt enough dismissal of your comment as humourless self-sufficient banter…

    But frankly, of your many strange assertions above, what I interpret as a claim that I may live in the French department of Hauts-de-Seine (92) leaves me somewhat confused: besides my specifically indicating that I live in Paris (75) at the top of this, admittedly long and self-serving, list of pointless facts, would seem to make it clear enough that I don’t live in “le 92”. Regardless, I’m curious: please could you tell me by any chance what my living in this department entails in terms of my “repugnant trendy bobo attitude” and my “not caring about all the suffering people on this earth” (quoting literally from you: hope you don’t mind).

    Or have I just totally misunderstood your colloquial use of these two digits here?

    Please enlighten me… pray tell, what do you mean by “reeks of 92” (I’m pretty sure Chanel has never gone past #5, so it could not be that either)…

    Yours in Christ,

  19. That is the best blogger about me section that I’ve ever read. I feel like I’ve known you for years now. You seem to be one cool cat and this girl will definitely holla back.

  20. Alright, you officially wasted about 20 minutes of my work time with this list. However, I couldn’t help but smile, seeing how you described some of the points that would also suit myself quite fine. And in view of the fact that reading the list kept me from nothing less than writing my resignation, wasting time is a very good thing. Thanks a bunch & Take care.

  21. Dear Doctor,
    Enjoy your comments ! Lived in Paris 50″s Yes I am and old Blogger ! I never found any foreign
    country Top of The Food Chain ! I lived In Cuba for a while this [BC] before Castro this was pallatable ! I like hats, my Favorite Borsalino [Italy] Resistol [Usa] ! Enjoy your site have no real opinions on
    Spam ! Be strong it gets better as we get older ! Puede Ser!

  22. Wow Dr. Dave! I thought I was on track for being introspective and having an exciting life, but you sir, have far outpaced me. You have done what others dream to do and encapsulated it here for the others to see that it is all possible. Now if we could only get the majority to think the way we do minus the phobias and spending of large amounts of income on footwear we could all really get grooving as a society. Any chance that we could just brainwash everyone and give them your mindset? It would be nice.

  23. I discovered this after installing spam karma. I haven’t had the chance yet to find out if it works..sounds like it does from your other commentators. This is a fabulous about me page. I also was amazed that I stayed glued through the whole list. I am rethinking my own about me page now.
    Your life sounds very interesting and full of adventure.
    I personally have a fear of wasps which I blogged about, and yes it isn’t about the wasp itself is it..I have deep digging to do..
    I will be sure to come back and visit. Keep it up kiddo…
    from an Island of granite in the Atlantic ocean, and bloody cold today.

  24. I stopped by to read a little more about SK and to thank you for the ultimate spam filtering plugin, and stayed to browse a little more. This page has been an interesting and enjoyable read. Thanks for sharing, not only your hard work and knowledge, but these colorful facts about you. 🙂

  25. Dr. Dave, you know, people who write 99 BS things about themselves are totally have hardcore complexes and cannot even drink a bottle of milk without analyzing their `personality` through this. This is so sad and funny at the same time. Sorry Dave, you are totally a miserable person. I am sorry for you! Yeah, you can delete this post, and you, I am sure, will, but your website is quite nice, besides this part about yourself. Grow up, boy; you might even get laid sometime after that.
    Angela, Tokyo

  26. Oh my… I was slightly caught up at the time and totally forgot about Angela’s comment here before I could post a reply (we certainly wouldn’t want to give the impression we don’t give a damn about such trolling).

    So here goes:

    Angela dearest,

    Thank you so much for raising concerns about inherent personality flaws of mine that might perspire through this page. You are so right. By the way, how did you know I have an introspective crisis every time I drink a bottle of milk? It got to a point where I had to switch over to coffee in the morning, to stand any chance being on time at work.

    I am happy beyond words that this display of my neuroses might somehow bring about both sorrow and joy into your heart, but please, do not feel too sorry for the miserable state of my life and personality: I live quite ok with this on a daily basis. Ignorance is bliss.

    Of course, I’d be tempted to say that you do not really strike me as a particularly happy person. Y’know, going ’round the net, posting inflammatory comments on complete strangers’ blogs… But I will assume this is just you on a bad day: reminiscing on a childhood without much hugging, long day teaching English to quasi-autistic Japanese OLs who think “shopping” and “housecleaning” make for valid answers to the “what’s your hobbies” perennial question, greasy salaryman trying to feel you up on the crowded subway… all that.

    I will also make sure to keep your advice in mind regarding that whole “growing up” thing you mention, though something tells me, given your sunny disposition and outlook on life, that the “getting laid” part is more of a projection than a sincere wish upon me. I wish I could help you with that, but I do ok as it is and not really planning any trip to Tokyo this month. I hear Kabukicho has just the right places to fulfill your needs in that department, provided you dig the J-boy-with-mullet-hairdo type.

    Anyway, so sorry again for subjecting your to that disgusting display of my most inner personality traits. I was pretty sure this page hadn’t been made mandatory reading to all internet users yet, but I might have missed the ruling. To prevent further disagreement on your end, I recommend you remain safely away from that thing they call “blogs” on the internets… I hear some people even post pictures of their cats on those.

  27. Right, another 5 page long BS about how you feel and what does that mean for eternity, earth and all Shinto gods in Miyazaki ken. Dude, its booooooooooring!!! I simply had to reply, cuz, what you wrote here, I bet took you these 3 month and tons of corrections. Well, you are just an English teacher; that is not the end of the world, but better, then most of you people, at least you can write about yourself and not about Japanese chicks. I’ll give you a plus for that. Look, I am super happy person, but I do hate dorks and wankers, and you are one of them. Deal with that. I got boobs, you are a dork. That stinks.
    PS Thanks for your concern, I am getting some all the time. My relationships are awesome. Wish you had some for yourself. Stop watching porn all night long, as I said, someday; when you are a big boy you might even get laid.

  28. Gee, Angela, for a super happy person, you sure seem to have a lot of anger in you. But I must give you credits: you are entertaining.

    Although I must admit I am a bit baffled as to how you got to end up on this page (well, ‘beats me how you manage to operate a computer and browse the internet altogether, but): you obviously haven’t read a single line of this website and anyway, let’s face it, it has little to offer to you, seeing how I rarely give hair dying tips or gossip updates on Paris Hilton’s latest adventures.

    Just to clear up some confusion, I am not the one living a miserable life in Japan, teaching English to innocent Japanese bystanders: you are. A fact that would send shivers of horrors down the spine of my ever English-loving third-grade English teacher. My occupation, albeit certainly dorkier, allows me to live a pretty happy and fulfilled life, with very little scouring the internet for random blogs to leave nonsense-ladden hysterical comments on. It even leaves me time to get laid, if you can imagine. Actually, I’d rather you don’t: your slightly morbid obsession with my personal sex life is creepy enough as it is.

    By the way: “you got boobs”? big deal. I have something else, if you want to play that little game. But – and I hate to steal the bread from the myriads of professionals who will no doubt make a healthy living off discussing your issues during billable hours one day – I reckon you might want to look no further for the root of that little anger-entitlement problem of yours… Look, I am absolutely sorry that you may have recently found out that “having boobs” does not constitute, in itself, a very highly regarded proof of accomplishment in life (at least not outside of the 4am last-call Roppongi bar market)… You will have to get over it someday, and yelling your inarticulate anger at random people over the Interweb, surely isn’t gonna help.

    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a freshly rented stack of porn DVDs to go watch.

  29. If I may also add, that as a clinician in the field of human behavior, I see little chance of Angela just projecting down the road to some other hapless place that isn’t crackling with the catty lexicon of “Sex in the City”, and complaining about that.

    I believe there will be more returns to activate what must now be called the Angela Email Notification System, previously known as “Dave Makes Another Cool Comment”

    This is worrisome, as, like a phone number you don’t give out freely, you don’t want just anyone calling.

    So please, Angela. ..Dorks and Wankers may upset you when you come across them here on AOL. But some of those nerds like that Gates fella are probably able to get as much “Boobs” as their 150 foot, streamlined ocean-yachts can carry.
    So don’t be so dismissive. Maybe there is a nerd you will look at differently now. *wink*

    Anyway, what I’m really trying to say is..this Dave guy seems pretty good with words, and you don’t. And it’s not gonna end nicely, as you already sense, I hope.

    He will say something…then you will say something…and my “inbox” will be filled with notifications…and it’s just a no-win for everybody.

    Like a dog that thinks people are other dogs, you don’t realize that you are way in over your head here and are staring at the gaping maw of Hell, as we speak.

    As long as you are getting some and your relationship(s?) are awesome thats enough men to be in contact with for now. Let us “Computer-Dorks” masturbate ourselves into a frenzy like rhesus monkeys at a Cialis lab, and you take care of the face to face stuff over there.

    Woah, “Sperms of Endearment ” is on Spice..gotta go! 🙂

  30. I had to laugh when you said “Yes, I am, indeed, a skinny white boy.” I mean “duh!” that is so clearly evident the site, the list. Btw, I don’t mean that there’s anything negative about it, just that it was so stating the obvious.

    I have zero fear of needles. I use them several times per day. Being opiod dependent, I gotta get some form of opiate into me every six to eight hours. Usually it’s morphine or heroin. However much I welcome a needle, I’m not over indulgent with them – no needless poking around or lingering with needle in arm just for the hell of it. Just in and out – efficiently used to get the job done.

    Funny though, I’m not the least interested in having a needle go into me for a tattoo.

    What’s the blogging platform? WordPress?

  31. Hey there Dave,
    I came across your site while trying to search for information on Roppongi. Me and a couple friends are going there tomorrow, but after reading your scathing review I’m not so sure anymore. Oh well, it’s only my 3rd week in Tokyo so I must experience the horror at least once!

    I enjoyed your list, but I think it needs one more item:
    #100 Demolished Angela with a verbal Kamekameha wave which incidentally wiped out a few solar systems on it’s way (yes, I love making ridiculous DBZ references, so what!)

    You sound like a really interesting guy who’s both humble yet has done a looooot of amazing stuff. And yes, I am trying to flirt with you

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