A look at the sins that shape this blogging machine of a man…

And we got in close order:

1. pride
2. lust
3. wrath
4. sloth
5. envy
6. gluttony
7. avarice

What’s your personal Top 7?

This is pointless enough with just what it needs of self-centered drivel in disguise, that it might make it as the next big blog filler around: knock yourself out, but if you do, in the name of all things sacred, just do not call it a meme. Or I’ll personally go all se7en on your ass. Thanks.

Now, you don’t think I was gonna post a list of flaws without some pathetic attempt at justifying them:

• pride: I would try to deny it, but WordPress Dashboard just informed me it has 534 pieces of evidence against me there. It would indeed appear that I am an egotistical fucker.
• lust: there again, little point living in denial. Like a rough 100% of my fellow gender, any thought process taking place in the upper body is under strict control from the lower parts… Though, provided we remain a few degrees above caveman behaviours, there’s hardly anything wrong with that.
  Just so we are clear: moving your greasy sociopath foreigner’s ass to a far-east country where you make it your life’s purpose to bed naive locals with low self-esteem is not lust. It’s creepy at best (that will probably warrant a rant of its own one day where I’m particularly bored).
• wrath: I think that one ties in with #1. Although it’s essential to stress that my wrath is never physical. I am the most dedicated non-violent there ever was (at least I have been, ever since my Judo teacher taught me the rudiments of self-control through ass-kicking at age seven).
• sloth: that’s a tricky one. Does procrastination qualify as sloth? Technically speaking, it’s kind of the opposite. But whether I shirk on my duties by doing a thousand other stupid things or just slouching on the couch in front of the telly (which I never do), I guess the end result is the same.
• envy: we are reaching the other side the median. In fact, I have the golden argument in favor of my not being the envious type: #1 in this list, again. Difficult to be both full of oneself and envious of others at the same time, innit?
  That and also the chance to experience early enough a lot of the things that I might otherwise still misguidedly be running after, if I didn’t know better (see: that insufferable smugness again).
• gluttony: hell, I wish (I could afford a few extra pounds these days). In fact, gluttony right down turns me off. You are talking to the guy who spontaneously went into a long bout of vegetarianism, in pure reaction to the dietary habits of his fellow residents at the time, in the glorious US of A, land of the glutton if there ever was one.
• avarice: that one is dead last on my list, both in terms of goals and, hopefully, present shortcomings. There isn’t a single thing I despise more.
  Above all previous 6 items in this list, I do believe avarice is the root of most of our problems, as a planet. From garden variety penny-pinching, all the way to corporate greed… it’s just not becoming at all.
  Just so we’re clear, once again: avarice is not frugality or even parsimony. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with living off little, especially when you have little, obviously. There is however something utterly fucked up, with placing the value of tiny pieces of paper over that of things like friendship, human lives or even simply the enjoyment of the present moment.

All in all, I could be doing much worse. I think this current scorecard, if we go by traditional counting methods, would get me somewhere between Second and Fifth circle…

Well, except that is, for all the Pimping and Seducing, that apparently lands me a choice seat in the front rows. Damn, I guess we’ll have to make the best we can of the company there…