You know what is worse than waking up to a water-heater that refuses to work when you go for your morning shower?

[…]

Having the fucking thing finally work, after you finished taking your cold shower.

There’s a poltergeist in my house, and it has a really stupid sense of humour.

My new apartment comes equipped with a pigeon coop: fresh pigeon eggs for breakfast every morning, straight from my balcony…

Note to the genius realtors who spruced-up the place before I moved in: enclosing the entire balcony in a metallic net to protect it from these flying rats, was a very good idea with laudable intent.

It would have been considerably more effective, had it not resulted in trapping an entire pigeon family on my balcony, inside that net.