Phone conversation

dr Dave: Hello?

Unknown Feminine Voice: Hello. May I speak to Mr. X?

drD: May I ask who’s calling and the purpose of your call?

UFC: I am calling for an invitation… Is Mr. X there?

drD: Who is asking?

UFC: … on behalf of Acme Inc. I would like to invite Mr. X to a one-time offer with…

drD: Mr. X is not here. He is currently serving time.

UFC:

UFC:

drD: FOR HUNTING, STALKING, HACKING TO BITS AND CARVING HIS INITIALS IN THE STILL-BEATING HEART OF THE LAST TELEMARKETER WHO CALLED WHILE HE WAS IN THE SHOWER.

UFC:

drD: Did it with a rusty phone antenna too.

drD: So who did you say you worked for again?

9 comments

  1. Felix

    I sure do. After leaving Cali 3 years ago, I didn’t even remember how it felt to be woken up at 9:01 by some wanker trying to sell me long-distance phone plans… until I moved in, and inherited a phone line that’s been around for a good decade or two and apparently on every single marketing lists known to man. To the extent I usually don’t even pick up, except when I’m supposed to meet a friend 30 minutes later, and incidentally taking a shower… thus resulting in the flooding of my whole apartment.

    Unknown Girl

    Damn, err, you sure wanna see these pictures, don’t you… which, if I may add, is kinda working against your earlier claim of non-stalkerness… Anywho…

    I already posted a pic of me, naked from the waist down! what more can I do?

    Really, there are pics of me on this blog. Very underwhelming ones at that. But I don’t [completely] hide. I guess a good place to start is:
    http://unknowngenius.com/blog/tag/drdave/

    Now I guess for anything more, I’ll have to return you the query: send us a pic of you wearing a “dr Dave, J’adore” or “I <heart> London & dr Dave” t-shirt, and we’ll consider more…

  2. Wow, has it really been three years since you’ve been gone? Then again, it has been a whole year since we left Cali. Sigh.

    Thankfully, we don’t aren’t on any telemarketing lists in Colombia, as 1) we have new line, 2) it is unpublished, 3) it is under our landlord’s name. I think if we got telemarketers here, it would drive me insane, partially because our ADSL connection mysteriously gets interrupted every time the phone rings. So much for those claims of “surfing and talking on the phone.”

    For the record: I also [heart] dr Dave….

  3. dr Dave: my apologies for getting off topic….

    urchin: thanks for your suggestion, but yes, I have checked my DSL filter. as a matter of fact, I have three different filters that my DSL provider left for me (maybe he knew that it was going to be a problem, and was hoping one of them might work.) all to no avail. when calling their tech support line, they just shrug. sigh. it’s only 6 more months of this anyways.

Leave a Reply