{"id":903,"date":"2005-05-05T11:28:48","date_gmt":"2005-05-05T02:28:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/2005\/05\/05\/tantalus\/"},"modified":"2005-07-12T20:09:13","modified_gmt":"2005-07-12T11:09:13","slug":"tantalus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/2005\/05\/05\/tantalus\/","title":{"rendered":"Now I know how Tantalus felt&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The definition of cruel is when your friends, over at your house for some lo-key, yet highly inebriated, bbq dinner, drunkenly (and unwittingly) opened that one <em>very<\/em> special bottle of Piper Heidsieck Special Millesime.<\/p>\n<p>No. Hold on. Cruel is when it turns out they drank but a glass and left a full uncorked bottle sitting there for you to mourn in the morning.<\/p>\n<p><em>Inhumanly<\/em> cruel, is when all this takes place in the middle of your shot at reaching ascetic enlightenment, and subsequent self-imposed ban on all forms of alcohol consumption.<\/p>\n<p>If I end up not drinking off that bottle today, I will personally write in a demand for a medal from the British National Temperance League.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The definition of cruel is when your friends, over at your house for some lo-key, yet highly inebriated, bbq dinner, drunkenly (and unwittingly) opened that one very special bottle of Piper Heidsieck Special Millesime. No. Hold on. Cruel is when it turns out they drank but a glass and left a full uncorked bottle sitting [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":4,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7,17,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-903","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-better-living-through-chemistry","category-insignificant-details","category-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/903","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=903"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/903\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=903"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=903"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=903"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}