{"id":689,"date":"2005-02-10T23:29:37","date_gmt":"2005-02-10T14:29:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/2005\/02\/10\/689\/"},"modified":"2006-05-30T02:25:34","modified_gmt":"2006-05-30T00:25:34","slug":"ask-dr-dave","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/2005\/02\/10\/ask-dr-dave\/","title":{"rendered":"Ask Dr. Dave"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>What do we blog about when we have nothing interesting to say and we have already posted so many pictures of the cat in the <a href=\"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/category\/keitai-log\/\">keitai log<\/a> that we are feeling a bit nauseated ourself?<\/p>\n<p>Why, but we skim our  log stats, of course! Digging that endless fodder of cheap entertainment that are <em>search engine referrer keyphrases<\/em>!<\/p>\n<p>You know what they say about the correlation between the size of a crowd and its collective IQ? Well that should be a good clue as to what to expect from the Web-using community at large.<\/p>\n<p>Let&#8217;s have a look, shall we:<br \/>\n[all italicized search strings below taken <em>verbatim<\/em> from my February server stats]<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><b><i>a guide to better living through alcohol<\/i><\/b>. Easy: Pour. Drink. Refill. Go back to step 1.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>japanese schoolgirl panties<\/i><\/b>: As we already pointed out, you stand better chances <a href=\"http:\/\/youtube.com\/watch?v=RM5Z8ld33YE\">over there<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>padawan definition<\/i><\/b>: isn&#8217;t that Klingon for &#8220;acneic virgin&#8221;?<\/li>\n<li><b><i>posted by xanax<\/i><\/b>: No. <strong>sponsored<\/strong> by Xanax<\/li>\n<li><b><i>hunting beavers<\/i><\/b>: just bait them with white birch&#8230;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><b><i>most luxurious airline<\/i><\/b>: <a href=\"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/archives\/2004\/10\/16\/the-most-luxurious-airline-in-the-world\/\">anything we can do to help<\/a><\/li>\n<li><b><i>what the fuck is wrong with girls<\/i><\/b>: my friend, when you find out, please come back and let me know. If while you are at it, you can find out what&#8217;s wrong with guys too, that&#8217;d be much appreciated.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>18 year old lesbian milfs<\/i><\/b>: I sense some confusion on the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.urbandictionary.com\/define.php?term=milf\">milf<\/a> concept here&#8230;<\/li>\n<li><b><i>does drinking too much caffeine make you sweat?<\/i><\/b>: dunno, I only shoot it up.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>jagermeister translation<\/i><\/b>: &#8220;Master Hunter&#8221; (and there&#8217;s an umlaut on <em>J\u00e4ger<\/em>)<\/li>\n<li><b><i>seltzer delivery man<\/i><\/b>: here is an idea that could make millions on a saturday morning<\/li>\n<li><b><i>i hate apple g4 powerbook<\/i><\/b>: me too, but don&#8217;t say it too loud, he&#8217;s easily irritable.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>the word filibuster used in a sentence<\/i><\/b>: Mmn, wait&#8230; &#8220;I will filibuster ass&#8221;? No, probably not&#8230;<\/li>\n<li><b><i>blog on xanax<\/i><\/b> (yea, seems like a recurrent theme): always a good idea, helps taking the edge off the Ritalin and stabilize the shaking long enough to type.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>family fun in taiwan<\/i><\/b>: I&#8217;m told it&#8217;s best to avoid Taipei&#8217;s Historical Heritage Museum of Venereal Diseases. Otherwise, it&#8217;s all family fun.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>what is a scientific experiment<\/i><\/b>: it&#8217;s a bit like cooking, except you are not supposed to taste the result at the end.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>getting laid in shinjuku<\/i><\/b>: try Kabukicho. Don&#8217;t forget to bring your credit card and your left hand.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>major industry sin nunavut<\/i><\/b>: I believe burlesque revues of seals wearing frilly lingerie is about as wild as the sin industry gets, back there in <a href=\"\">Nunavut<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>weblog nietzsche<\/i><\/b> (two people came searching for that one): I&#8217;m told he is on LiveJournal posing as a 16-year teenager girl writing bad goth poetry.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>planes for dummies<\/i><\/b>. That one comes  broken down in two volumes. Ask for &#8220;Takeoff for Dummies&#8221; or &#8220;Landing for Dummies&#8221;<\/li>\n<li><b><i>how to get fucked up<\/i><\/b>: ever tried bleach?<\/li>\n<li><b><i>how much is too much caffeine<\/i><\/b>: I guess when the xanax won&#8217;t stop the shaking anymore, it&#8217;s time to cut-down.<\/li>\n<li><b><i>come smells like bleach<\/i><\/b>: probably time to stop drinking bleach<\/li>\n<li><b><i>what to say on a tip jar<\/i><\/b>: &#8220;Help us save Ethiopian orphans&#8221;?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And we shall leave the last say to one of our most ardent fan out there:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><b><i>site unknowngenius.com must die<\/i><\/b>: couldn&#8217;t agree more!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Best of the Worst&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":4,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[32],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-689","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-procrastination"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/689","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=689"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/689\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=689"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=689"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unknowngenius.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=689"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}