Epilepsy-inducing Seasonal Fun

Picture xmas_lights.jpg What I learned today:

  1. Xmas lights are fun.
    OK: I knew that one already, but I mean, they are really fun… Actually, when they are done remodeling my loft in Manhattan, I’ll make sure I have them install a dozen of these sets I got for 1,000 yens at Don Qixote yesterday (don’, don’, don’, donkyyy ♪ don’ kyyy ♪ ho-hotayyyh ♪♪… ahem, sorry, can’t help it: months of conditioning will do that to you…)
  2. Blinking xmas lights are very fun
  3. Blinking xmas lights are very fun: for a while
  4. Decrypting the half baked japanese directions somewhat printed on the back of the cheap carton box to find out how to turn off the blinking is way less fun
  5. However tempting, the tacks that hold the lights to the wall are not to be affixed to the wall with the assistance of a hammer or any other bulky object. And we all know it is very tempting to handle a bulky wooden japanese mallet a few inches away from delicate, highly breakable, tiny capsules of glass.
  6. If you fail to follow previous advice and end up turning one of the aforementioned tiny capsules into a pinch of cheerfully colored powder, resist the urge to do the same on the rest of the garland, for the sole purpose of figuring how long it’d take you to get them all.
  7. If you accidentally get high (these things happen), never, ever, under any circumstances, start looking in the directions of the resulting lighting structure: people have died of starvation that way.

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